How to convince someone to go to rehab

Here’s a cliché: drug or alcohol abuse takes a massive toll not only on the one addicted, but on their loved ones, too. Of course, the reason that sentiment has become cliché is because it’s absolutely true. If you’re currently watching someone you love struggling with addiction, then you know what we mean.

Convincing someone you love to seek treatment and enter rehabilitation is not going to be easy. But it is not impossible. And you won’t have to do it alone. We’re going to teach you five key ways to convince someone you love to go to rehab. 

‍The Hader Clinic offers a wide range of resources for friends and families of people struggling with addiction. Our services include drug and alcohol interventions. You are always welcome to give us a call so our addiction specialists can answer all your questions.  

5 tips to help a loved one seek addiction treatment

1. Do your research

The better informed you are about the services and possibilities offered at a rehab facility, the better you’ll be able to convince your loved one that rehab can help them.

It’s hard to predict how people struggling with substance abuse will react when offered rehab. Some know they have a problem but feel too isolated to ask for the help they need — they may appreciate your concern almost immediately. Others might react defensively, even aggressively. Negative reactions are often born out of a fear of rehab facilities or the refusal to acknowledge the depth of their problem. 

In our experience, addiction often pairs with mental health disorders, such as depression and stress. While addiction often causes or exacerbates mental illness, drugs and alcohol are also often used to self-medicate against pre-existing conditions. You can reassure your loved one that rehab can help them manage their struggles with safer, long-term strategies and medication.

If you’re able to ease their fears and explain the signs of addiction to them, you may be able to get them to at least consider rehab. That in itself is a major step in the right direction.

The Hader Clinic offers several types of alcohol and drug addiction treatment. You can read up on the details here, but we also suggest calling us for a consultation.

• 14 or 28-Day Detox And Withdrawal program
  Consider this our ‘first step’ program. Here, we’ll help your loved one manage withdrawal symptoms under constant medical supervision. We’ll also give them regular group and individual counselling.
• Inpatient rehabilitation
  Once our patient has overcome the height of their withdrawals, they can move into our residential facility for round-the-clock care. Our medical staff and licensed therapists will create a personalised treatment program for them, with therapies designed to improve their physical, emotional, social, psychological and spiritual well-being.
• Outpatient relapse prevention programs
  Patients who feel confident enough to re-enter society can do so knowing that we will continue to support them. We can offer them shelter in our transitional housing facilities, and will encourage them to continue attending our group and individual therapies as part of their outpatient treatment. Ongoing peer support can make a monumental difference as your loved one practices sobriety.
• Forensic and legal services
  If your loved one is anxious about the legal consequences of things they’ve done while battling their addiction, we can advocate for them, in court, to be transferred to our inpatient treatment facilities.

2. Speak with compassion, never judgement

People struggling with addiction often struggle with negative self-perception. Speaking to them compassionately assures them that they matter to you and their life is worth saving. Judgement and anger, even if you feel it’s justified, may push them deeper into their addiction.

While those struggling with drug addiction can commit immoral acts (such as theft, lying or even violence), addiction itself is not a matter of morality. If your loved one has hurt you, others or themselves in some way, it’s perfectly natural for your love to be coloured with betrayal, resentment, anger and frustration. It can be hard to put those feelings aside. But compassion must remain at the core of your conversation with your loved one and that doesn’t mean you have to hide how you feel.

Here are some specific strategies to take into a conversation with your loved one.

• Studies show that using ‘I’ statements (rather than ‘You’ statements) can help you express your feelings without passing judgment on the other person. For example, saying “I think you need to enter rehab” rather than “You have to enter rehab” feels like an expression of genuine concern rather than a forceful command.
• Remind them of their place within familial and social circles. Statements like “Mum and dad would love to see you this weekend” can help them break out of the isolation or shame they might feel due to their addiction.
• Offer to spend time with them in drug and alcohol-free settings. Take them to a movie, their favourite restaurant, or a park for a walk with a pet. Not only is this an opportunity for socialisation, but it could also be a safe time to voice your concerns about their habits and convince them to try rehab.

3. Convince them over multiple conversations

A single conversation will likely not be enough for someone struggling with addiction to enter rehab. Having multiple discussions allows you to address emotional and practical concerns separately, and helps make sure that they don’t feel overwhelmed, pressured or attacked.

It’s impossible to say how many attempts you’ll need to make to convince your loved one. It’s equally impossible to say what each conversation should be about. Instead, you should do your best to remain empathetic and responsive to their needs in the moment. 

People struggling with addiction will give several reasons why they don’t want to enter rehab. You’ll discover these reasons during your first few conversations with them. Some reasons will be emotional, and others will be practical. Once you seriously start making the attempt to convince them, try having brief conversations to address specific claims.

• If they’re concerned about feeling alone, affirm your ongoing support and remind them of their friends and family who still love them and want to see them get better.
• If they don’t know what rehabilitation entails, tell them about the services The Hader Clinic offers and how we can address their specific problems.
• If they don’t believe they have a problem, or think they’re in control, speak to them about specific instances where you or others were especially concerned about their behaviour.

Over these several conversations, you’ll hopefully be able to chip away at their aversion to rehabilitation slowly and, in time, get them to consider longer, more serious discussions about getting help.

4. Intervention

As much as you and your family care for your loved one, you may feel that you do not have the ability to help them. Don’t feel ashamed — this is something countless families go through.

The Hader Clinic’s substance abuse intervention service can help your family. Our certified interventionists can help you confront your addicted loved one with a compassionate and non-adversarial yet firm approach. We structure interventions based on our experience with a range of evidence-based treatments. 

Get in touch. Let us help you.

5. Take care of your own mental health

Seeking help for a loved one can sometimes mean seeking help for yourself.

Reading through everything we’ve covered so far, it should be clear that convincing someone you care about to go to rehab can be an extremely demanding task. There are rarely easy ways to convince someone to do it. It will demand your time, your patience, your emotional energy and potentially your financial resources. It’s not easy.

It’s important to prioritise your own well-being, but we know that’s often easier said than done. Depending on the depth of your loved one’s addiction, caring for yourself might sometimes mean stepping away from caring for them. That can leave you feeling guilty or ashamed. But caring for yourself is not a failure of your character.

We strongly recommend looking into counselling services if you’re struggling with guilt, shame, stress and anxiety. There are counsellors who specialise in helping the friends and families of people battling alcohol and drug abuse disorders. Speak to your GP about a mental health referral.